Disclaimer, I don’t make a habit of listening to other people’s conversations, but every once in a while you’ll hear something so snazzy you’ll pull out your phone to “fake scroll” so you can really tune in.
This happened to me at the hairdresser’s last Thursday. The woman next to me was complaining to the hairdresser about her silly love life as she exclaimed, “Like the last guy I dated was married!”
OK girlfriend, you have my attention!
It turns out there are a bunch of married guys on the dating apps who want to see what all the fuss is about — and the way this guy did it was so sneaky it almost awed me Has.
She explained that she stole straight from this guy and they shared a few quick messages before telling her that he felt overwhelmed by the app and was going to shut it down but if it was ok he would prefer to chat with her via SMS .
So they exchanged phone numbers and started communicating via text messages. The next night she went on a date with him and she found him so charming that they ended up naked together. Hey why not.
He had explained that he was away on business and would make sure they went out again the next time he was in town. She was thrilled and looking forward to seeing him again.
Now lean in, dear reader, because that’s where the scandal comes in! The next day, she’s on Facebook and notices that a picture of the guy she was dating has appeared in her Friends Wanted column… only the name doesn’t match the photo.
See, she’s dated a ben, and that guy’s name is ‘Tony’. hmm…
She switches to full female inspector gadget mode and dives into this Facebook profile. Apparently, he actually lives interstate… with a wife and child.
She knows it’s him because his profile picture is the same one he had on his dating app (idiot!), and it seems like he decided to give himself a fake name when he got up to work was driving the Autobahn so he could see the other (single) half live.
It turns out that if you save someone’s cell phone number in your phone contacts, Facebook will find their profile and add them to your “Recommended Friends” list. Wow. The guy was sprung from Mark Zuckerberg!
Now it doesn’t end there, oh no Then she looks up his wife’s Facebook profile, finds out where she works, calls the company, asks to speak to the woman and tells her everything.
Over the next week, the woman asks for screenshots and details about their date, which she provides, effectively blowing up their marriage.
Unfortunately, I didn’t get any further details because it was time for the hairdresser to wash out my slides (boo, hiss!), but it got me thinking about how easy it is to use the cheat shenanigans apps.
I remember coming across a friend’s married brother on the apps a few years ago. The old pal had airbrushed his photos (shrugs), but he definitely was.
So it’s no surprise that, according to a recent study by research firm GlobalWebIndex (GWI), a whopping 30 percent of dating app users are married, while another 12 percent are in a relationship.
Well, I understand that those who dated before the dating app era probably feel like they missed out on some fun dates and bedroom antics, and to be fair… you did.
But it’s not just sexts and cocktails my friends, oh no. It’s also about finding yourself on nightmarish dates, getting hooked, and trying to decipher if someone really is the six foot their profile claims they are. Spoiler alert: the grass isn’t always greener.
And you know what’s even more annoying for a single person than realizing they’re dating someone they have zero interest in… dating someone they’re interested in but got cheated on because that person is married ? .
So here’s an idea for all you smart dating app makers… how about we make it a rule that you can’t join an app unless you’re verified. It’s 2022, it can’t be that hard, can it?! Oh, and married people, stay away from us! Good god, the dating world is never boring.